He passed out mid-signature
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
