the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
