"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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