she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
