is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
