You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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