What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
