I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
