Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
