I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
