And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
