I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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