If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
