sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
