Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Say something about gay babies.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
