I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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