Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
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