butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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