what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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