I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
