Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Randomize
