she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
