You don't have asthma, your pregnant
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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