I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
