I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
You've changed since you got that strap on
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
