I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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