Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
