I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize