The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
