dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
