just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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