Three words: puerto rican gang bang
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize