paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
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