I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
