It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
