He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
