Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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