doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
