Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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