i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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