Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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