i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
