sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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