he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
