just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
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