we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
