This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize