the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
