did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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