ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize