Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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