Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize